You love your partner. You are just exhausted by the end of the day and sex is the last thing on your mind. You almost dread going to bed because you know they will want sex. Your thighs are fat and you do not like your body. It is not your partner. You could just care less. The problem is not that you don‘t enjoy the sex once it gets going…it is the getting it going to start with that is the problem.
I don’t want to ignore the fact that there definitely could be some hormonal/physical/psychological things going on. See your health care provider and discuss this with them.
I also don’t pretend to have all of the answers but for a possible quick fix…try this:
Put sex and your relationship back up on the priority list. You guys deserve to be up on the top of that list! Right now it goes: breakfast, dishes, kids, work, house, laundry, homework, dinner, piano lessons, relationship, sex …. It only makes sense. We are so busy today trying to get everything done that we become task masters to “the schedule” and become working partners- not sex partners.
Forget the schedule!! When you have a few free minutes- don’t do the laundry or the floors. Go find him/her and jump their bones. By doing this you are showing your partner that they are more important then the laundry. In the beginning you might think ,” I really need to get the laundry folded”. STOP- Do you really? Do this on YOUR time frame and you shouldn’t feel resentful or pressured. You may have more fun. This is a gift that you can give to your relationship. Then do the laundry.
By putting yourselves back up on the list you may find that you really missed having this relationship with your partner. ..and you might start seeing that libido again.
Originally Posted on the ObGyn Gal’s Blog